What are the chances Pam’s wedding dress will be as short and transparent as this little number?

Pam’s getting hitched again! The buxom mommy x2 is gonna give it a go with infamous Rick Salomon. You may remember Rick from his widely-viewed sexcapade with Paris Hilton. “One Night in Paris” is not Ricky’s only claim to fame tho. He was also married to Brenda from 90210, the notoriously bitchy Shannen Doherty. We’ve gotta love a guy who knows how to latch onto female celebs!

We’re proud of Pam ‘n Rick for planning a quickie ceremony at the White Wedding Chapel instead of attempting to outdo her extended nuptial celebration with Kid Rock. That overdone boat party contributed way too much to the ground-level ozone problem.

We’re sending out our best vibes to the couple and hope this marriage sticks! Informr Bean

Do-gooders in all arenas

The Jolie-Pitts are doin’ it up on the Social Cause front …yet again! This time, our favorite power couple has stepped up to the Climate Change and Global Warming podium at the Clinton Global Initiative, an organization founded by the former president.

We’re glad that the significant event attracted a powerful celebrity presence, yet we worry that Jolie-Pitt Inc. may be monopolizing the Hollywood social cause biz. Couldn’t they loosen their vice-like grip on goodwill-ambassadorship and let some other awesome green Hollywood couples rep climate change hard?

Here’s a list of our fave green celeb couples that we’d like to see break into the market:

1. Leonardo Dicaprio & Bar Rafaeli

2. Cameron Diaz & whoever she’s dating

3. Britney Spears and Justin Bobby
….ok sorry we made that up. That’s just weird.. and a bad visual. Chesterman

The models are gonna help Mother Earth this season!

How awesome is this?! We loved America’s Next Top Model before, but now we’re committed to the new season of gaunt girls. The ever-popular show glorifying eating disorders nationwide is going green! Who doesn’t want to watch skinny bitches ridin’ around in a bus powered by biodiesel fuel and sporting seats made out of recycled tires? We are loving this!

So props to Tyra, uber hottie Gay Jay and the rest of the gang for doing their part to help out the planet! Informr Bean

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Kiefer Sutherland, star of FOX drama 24, was arrested early this morning on DUI charges in Los Angeles after making an illegal U-turn. His breathalyzer test showed that he more than doubled the legal blood-alcohol limit of .08.

Jack Bauer got shit-faced at the FOX Fall Eco-Casino party which kicks off FOX’s fall season and benefits Habitat for Humanity and the Nature Conservancy. He then smartly decided to drive home. We’re not sure if it was a cash bar, but if it was, Kiefer definitely did his part for the environment.

This isn’t the first time Kiefer went cruisin’ post-boozin’. In 2004, he was busted for DUI and was given five years of probation and 50 hours of community service. He’ll have to face a judge on October 16 where, if convicted, he’ll have to do more than a PSA, he’ll have to spend five days in the slammer.

Adding insult to his injured police record, Kiefer was supposed to be honored today by the Alliance of Canadian Cinema, Television and Radio Artists for his contribution to Canadian actors.

Bacon Bits

Whoa! Nicole Richie’s really filled out quickly. We know she’s 5 months preggers, but we’re honestly shocked at how much bigger the once miniscule sometimes-BFF of Paris is already!

Nicole soaked up some rays on a Hawaiian vaca with babydaddy Joel Madden recently. Hopefully, the pair helped out the Clean Beaches Council during their stay.

Hey, maybe she really is serious about focusing on her health for the sake of the petit pain in her oven! We certainly hope so, but either way she looks way better than she did last time we saw her in a bikini… Now that was scary!

We have faith in Nicole to pop out a beautiful tot who’ll give little Suri and baby Shiloh a run for their trust funds any day. Informr Bean

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He looks so happy!

Is it him? Pictures of boxing great Oscar De La Hoya in fishnet hosiery surfaced earlier this week. The champ says the photos are phonies. Oscar’s stripper friend, Scores employee Milana Dravnel (below), says that not only are the photos legit, she took them when they were wasted together at the Ritz-Carlton in Philadelphia recently.

One in the drink, one in the stink and the conniving stripper.

We don’t actually care what either says, we‘ve already decided it’s him. In fact, we’re not surprised Oscar feels so at home in that fishnet bodysuit. His spin doctors have been hard at work talking about how evil Photoshop can be, but what they should be talking about is how evil fish nets can be. By painting De La Hoya as a dolphin lover trying to raise awareness about the ecological evil-doings of ghost nets (a big problem caused when fishermen dump industrial fishing nets in the ocean), he can play the green card instead of that played-out Photoshop card.

Bacon Bits

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Gisele sporting an aqua dress and a pair of Ipanema Gisele Bundchen sandals.

Leo’s leftovers, supermodel Gisele Bundchen, unveiled the new ads for the eco-friendly line of sandals she designed for Brazilian shoe company, Grendene. The line, creatively dubbed Ipanema Gisele Bundchen, supports water conservation in Brazil’s Xingu River.

When we last wrote about Gisele, she was throwing eco-friendly pot shots at Bridget Moynahan, her current beau Tom Brady’s baby-mama-ex. Now, she wants to hurl eco-friendly insults at your feet. We love the ads and appreciate the greenness, but sporty Birkenstocks? We think the proceeds from a Brady/Bundchen sex tape might help the Xingu River a bit more.

PS: Speaking of the Brady Bunch, Marcia and Jan used to be lovers.

Bacon Bits

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Kate Moss and Courtney Love snort and make up

Life Lesson #1: Never lend Courtney Love your clothes. In fact, never lend Courtney Love anything of yours that has any type of value — because chances are that your goods are going to come back damaged, broken, burned and/or covered in some foul smelling unidentified substance.

Kate Moss recently lent a vintage Dior gown to Love for a party last week (Moss’ decision was probably made in the heat of the cocaine-addled-moment), which Love proceeded to wear, tear and deconstruct in such a way that it exposed her left buttock to the world. Well done, you.

Life Lesson #2: Kate Moss is not a bitch. Remember, this is a woman that dealt with the bizarre antics of man-child addict Pete Doherty, meaning that she is able to put up with anything.

At Thursday’s Adidas by Stella McCartney party, Moss confronted Love saying, “I hear you stood on my frock.” To which Love responded with a slew of apologies and excuses. To which Moss responded by revealing that she was just having a laugh.

Life Lesson #3: You can get away with anything by rectifying your misdeed with a decent amount of public humiliation. Love ripped Moss’s dress, then flashed her ass to the paparazzi. The two are now best friends.

Life Lesson #4: Eco-peepz run in the same circles. Green designer Stella McCartney (designer of the Environmental Bag), and Kate Moss BFF, may just end up having a positive influence on these two rexatrons. Drizzler

The Juice is out on bail, but back in our hearts. O.J. Simpson posted $125,000 bail and was released from a Las Vegas jail after he was charged with offenses including kidnapping and armed robbery. The charges stem from a confrontation with men that allegedly stole sports memorabilia from him.

O.J. played Detective Nordberg in The Naked Gun, so we always knew he could act. Now that he’s makin’ moves again, we’re actually quite proud of his recent performance. If you haven’t heard the tape of him scaring the hell out of a bunch of sports paraphernalia collectors, you need to. Lucky for them, The Juice is playing a really angry Nordberg and not say…a really angry O.J.

Because we condone most self-destructive impulses, we’d like to thank O.J. for giving us fodder and skipping the slow-speed chase. Like we told LiLo, debauchery with a small carbon footprint is our favorite kind.

Full disclosure: back in the day, we named our dog Al Cowlings, after the guy driving the Bronco.

Bacon Bits

She’s still got game!

We love this! Even celeb has-beens are goin’ green! Billie Jean King, whose big heyday came about before we were even a twinkle in daddy’s eye, is using her famous name for an eco cause. The feminist tennis pro has launched GreenSlam, which aims to help sports orgs bring about socially responsible change. They’re gonna put together some environmentally savvy experts to set standards for sporting events and venues alike.

Does this mean we’ll see more recycling bins in stadiums? No more icky unrecyclable paper beer cups strewn about?! We’re liking the sound of this! We might even go to a game now if GreenSlam manages to clean up Shea!

She may be getting on in her years, but Billie’s still shakin’ up the sporting world! Informr Bean