How George Michael Should Spend His Inevitable Community Service

George Michael has been arrested in a bathroom. Again. This time for drugs.

Drugs, sex; there’s so much a bathroom has to offer! There’s some third thing you can do there, if you’re not a celebrity or something.

Since George Michael is inevitably going to be serving community service for getting all his vices in the most public of places, we thought we might have some suggestions.

First of all, he can help convert bathrooms to be more environmentally friendly. He loves bathrooms, we love the environment. Boom.

Then he can work for a plan recycling paper into toilet paper.

Do you see where this bit is going? I’m not done.

And then, finally, he can help researchers—because George Michael is all kinds of smart—convert human waste into energy.

Thanks, George Michael! Because you can’t wait until you get home, the Earth will soon be a better place.

MD

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