Want to groom like Brad Pitt? We know you do. It’s ok, we do too, even though most of us here at Beanstockd don’t have ’staches to shave. Pitt has signed on to endorse a new, eco-friendly line of body products from Kiehl’s, our favorite too-expensive-but-oh-so-good pharmacy. The aloe vera biodegradable liquid cleanser will be released in October, and sadly, Brad won’t appear on the bottle, or in the ads. Happily, all proceeds will go straight to JPF Eco Systems, a new foundation created by Kiehl’s and Pitt to benefit global initiatives to "minimize impact on the environment through thoughtful design." Read: the cleanser is expected to make at least $1 million big ones; going green has never been so profitable. Or so sexy. Mmm, Brad Pitt. This is one expense we’re just going to have to justify.

Sarah

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Did you hear? Angelina Jolie has checked into the hospital to have her twins! We’re betting you did hear. Everyone knows. We walked by a taxi stand last night and the only words we could make out were "Brangelina" and "esploder," again and again!

She hasn’t had the baby yet, but thanks to Jack Black everyone is expecting a double-whammy. We may not know when the moment has arrived till a little after its over, though. Angelina has a security laden floor of a hospital in Nice, France, to herself and her crew. Meanwhile, Pitt’s holding the very expansive fort down with the rest of the brood nearby.

The biggest news in progeny has come out at the same moment as the biggest news in forest conservation. The New York Times is reporting a $510 million deal to preserve 500 square miles of former timber land in Montana. As the price of lumber falls, developers have been buying it to build housing. Protecting this forest land and keeping it intact is important, because its one of the only US ecosystems that hasn’t had any extinctions since the Lewis & Clark.

Lewis & Clark? Now those would be cute names for two twins.

BradyDale

Rising gas prices are pulling people from the pumps and pushing them to public transportation. As you run to catch the subway with your Dasani in hand, remember you look absolutely ridiculous for being that person on the escalator, and also because you’re paying more for that water than you would for gas. Even with gas breaking the bank at $4/gallon (about 3 cents an ounce), we’re still shelling out $1/bottle of water (about 5 cents an ounce) that, to be honest, isn’t much more pure than your sink, and just makes for more waste to clog up our landfills. It’d be awesome if everyone remembered to recycle all this plastic (they don’t), but it’d be way more awesome if everyone remembered that producing these handy dandy Deer Parks costs more than pictures of the future Jolie-Pitt twins will—whenever they pop out, that is.

IK

Angelina Jolie was outed today by Jack Black—she’s having TWINS! Shiloh’s baby pics snagged $4 million, how much do you think this duo will rake in?

Baby news doesn’t get much bigger than Brangelina popping out a pair, but until Perez is preggers with his clone, we’re getting bored scanning for baby bumps. We’re more interested in the biggest solar roof ever built! PPL Energy is building a roof full of solar panels in New Jersey that’s so big it will spare the atmosphere 65,000 barrels worth of oil emissions every year. That’s almost enough solar panels to put a roof over the heads of that expanding Jolie-Pitt clan. Isn’t solar energy grande?

You know what else is cool about the solar industry? It’s already working on a scheme to recycle old solar panels. Like Angelina’s soon-to-be lactating boobs, the news just gets bigger and bigger.

BradyDale

Hey Beanies,

Just got back from Spring Vaca…aka sitting on my ass in front of the tv.

So, Bear Stearns collapsed and JPMorgan Chase picked up the pieces. Sorry summer interns, looks as though you’ll be mowing lawns this summer. Perhaps you can look for a green job instead?

While McCain was renewing his Geritol prescription, the Dems were imploding. The last seven news cycles were filled with more Obama endorsements and more calls for Hillary to drop out of the race. There was also the problem of Hillary surviving Bosnian sniper fire. Did Sinbad just Swift Boat the Clintons? We’ll see in three weeks.

On Saturday, Australia went dark for the second annual Earth Hour. Its citizens, as well as famous landmarks like the Sydney Opera House, turned off their lights for 60 planet cooling minutes. Even McDonalds of Australia turned off their famous Golden Arches. Did we mention over 20 other cities around the globe played, too? If you missed it, you can still turn off all of your stuff for an hour, or even the whole night.

Did they or didn’t they? Star reported Angelina and Brad’s secret wedding in New Orleans this weekend, but the pair weren’t actually in the state at all. We kind of hope this is not true because everyone knows that marriage in Hollywood = Divorce. One relationship that’s lasted through the ages though is No Doubt. Gwen and the boys are back in the studio working on new material!

Play ball!